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BLACK MAGIC

With the weather warming up, you might be thinking about planning a camping trip. The closest and most convenient spot we know of is at the Wild Project this weekend, where downtown talents Amber Martin and Nath Ann Carrera are pitching their tents at Witch Camp. “Learning yurts,” delightful camp rituals (such as something called “Morning Horses/Blood Sacrifice”), and classic campfire songs by Black Sabbath, Yoko Ono, Pink Floyd, and more will surely prove more interesting than all that nature stuff you could find outside the city. But if they offer you a necklace with tannis root, head for the door.

Fri., April 18, 8 p.m.; Sat., April 19, 8 p.m.; Sun., April 20, 8 p.m., 2014

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WINTER WONDERLAND

Before Justin Vivian Bond takes the stage at CSC next month in Bertolt Brecht’s A Man’s a Man, you can catch the always delightful performer for a proper downtown-style holiday show at Justin Vivian Bond and Friends: Let it Snow. Mx. Bond will be joined by a talented crew of pals, including Thomas Bartlett, Amber Martin, Nath Ann Carrera, and Brett Every. To make the evening more festive, order up the special holiday cocktail, a delicious mix of zubrówka vodka, spiced orange cordial, white cranberry, lemon, and sparkling wine.

Sun., Dec. 22, 9:30 p.m., 2013

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ENTER STARMAN

Attention all space oddities, queen bitches, and young Americans—David Bowie’s 65th birthday is almost here (it’s January 8) and to celebrate, the BowieBall is landing its spaceship once again at (le) poisson rouge. If you don’t have a striped jumpsuit, mullet wig, or red dancing shoes, stylists will be on hand to make the appropriate ch-ch-ch-changes (apologies) to your makeup, hair, and wardrobe. DJs and a live band—including pretty things Amber Martin, Bridget Everett, and Lady Rizo—will play Bowie’s greatest hits and lead everyone in a sing-along. At past balls, Debbie Harry and Chloë Sevigny have been spotted in the crowd, so look closely—you never know who might be under all that glitter.

Sat., Dec. 17, 11 p.m., 2011

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GOING TO THE CHAPEL

Four years ago, Mrs.V and Cherelynore first laid eyes on each other at the faux-queen party debut Victoria at the Stonewall, and—yadda, yadda, yadda—they’re legally getting married tonight! Our very own Sharyn Jackson, co-creator of the Victoria and “We Love the Golden Girls” party, has become a wedding planner for tonight’s celebratory nuptials that include a runway contest and a style station where guests are invited to become their very best faux-queen. (Think Dolly Parton, Cher, Madonna, or, as the flyer explains, women with “gay men trapped in their vaginas.”) Amber Martin will act as DJ and host. Murray Hill will officiate the ceremony. Who else did you expect?

Sat., Sept. 24, 2011

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LONG SHOW, SHORT SKIRT

Nath Ann Carrera, the beautiful, often loincloth-clad singer, isn’t known for wearing full-length anything, but tonight he’s experimenting with the concept of “full-length” when he performs his first full-length show in New York. Carrera has been making cameos in downtown shows for years, playing folk tunes alongside Amber Martin, Dave End, and Mx. Justin Vivian Bond (Carrera is Bond’s long-term “traveling companion”). Now, Carrera takes over the spotlight with “sensationalistic monologues, cultish lesbian separatist murder ballads, women in prison, historic and contemporary anti-assimilationist queer depravity,” and so much more. Most likely, there’ll be a gold lamé loincloth, too.

Sun., Aug. 21, 8 p.m., 2011

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SHADES OF AMBER

Reba McEntire spoon-jamming on a Soundgarden track at an Ethiopian restaurant wouldn’t top most performers’ bucket lists of roles, but Amber Martin is the exception. This bizarro-Reba is one of a collection of insane characters borne from the wild imagination of this uncannily talented singer-comedian. In Amber Alert!, Martin flies ADD-style through her trippy oeuvre, stopping for a few thrilling torch songs, folk ditties, and rock screamers along the way. As thrilling as her voice is, the characters are the main draw. And the less you try to make sense of them, the more meaningful they can be. “Usually my shows have no narrative, really,” she said in a short doc by Casey Spooner, one of the guests in her show. “It’s like flipping the channel—on acid.”

Sat., May 21, 7 p.m., 2011

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OSCAR ALL-STARS

If you’re as bored by the Academy Awards as we are, have no fear—Murray Hill is here! The self-proclaimed “hardest working middle-aged man in show business” holds his annual Oscar Party at Joe’s Pub with snarky commentary galore. He’s joined by a team of downtown performance artists, including Neal Medlyn, Erin Markey, Amber Martin, Jenn Harris, and Jack Ferver, who will re-enact memorable performances from this year’s crop of nominees (they could do Black Swan all night) and the top 5 best and worst acceptance speeches in Oscar history. Try your hand at an Oscar ballot for the chance to win the evening’s grand prize (which includes a Pillow Pet). There are also prizes for movie trivia and best- and worst-dressed audience members. Or set your sights a little lower and go for the “Three Sheets to the Wind” Award, given to the audience member who is the most wasted.

Sun., Feb. 27, 7 p.m., 2011

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WIG OUT!

Amber Martin does a spot-on impersonation of Reba McEntire, Rue McClanahan, and, oddly enough, Whitney Houston. See who else the performance artist has got up her sleeve and under her wigs in Amber Alert!, a survey of some of Martin’s strangest and most uncanny bits. She’ll be changing personas no less than eight times, without ever leaving the stage. And the talent runs in the family: Joining Martin on a few musical numbers is none other than Cheryl Martin, the mother of this comic Sybil.

Thu., Dec. 23, 7:30 p.m., 2010

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Amber Alert! Go See the Real Reba McIntyre!

Amber Martin is a singer/comic who does Reba McIntyre even better than Reba herself.

She’s flat-out hilarious, and she’ll apparently be doing that bit at Joe’s Pub this very Sunday, you little deep-fried fritters you.

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Check out the above video by Russ Turk and you’ll see glimmers of Amber’s other talents as well:

Heavy metal, Patsy Cline-ing, scary witchery, and even a Tracy Chapman tune.

So take your fast car to Joe’s and be someone, be someone.

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HOLIDAY TERRORS

If you grew up with the American version of Christmas, you’ve likely never heard of the German horned demon Krampus, who punishes bad children around the holidays, or the beastly Frau Perchta, who hates lazy children so much that she slits open their bellies and stuffs them with debris. (Sure makes the whole lump-of-coal-in-the-stocking thing sound appealing, doesn’t it?) Tonight, meet these mythical creatures and others who spread holiday misery at downtown performer Adam Dugas’s eighth installment of his bawdy, heavy-metal holiday extravaganza Chaos and Candy: Unholy Night. The wicked lineup stars rockers Theo Kogan (Lunachicks) and Yana Chupenko (Shiny Mama) and performance artists Angela DiCarlo, the operatic Joseph Keckler, Amber Martin, and a terrifying ensemble of singers, dancers, and puppeteers.

Thu., Dec. 17, 8:30 p.m., 2009